This may just be one of the most difficult posts I’ve decided to write as it still gets me emotional. Now, I’m not sure why, as if it wasn’t for the moments I am about to share, we wouldn’t be even more blessed than we are today. I really hope that made sense.
We knew that once we were discharged after our hospital stay, life would be difficult once we were on our own, with just the four of us. We were released August 30, 2015 at about 3pm. We were super excited to get home. Once we got home and settled, we realized “oh crap, we need bottles! And formula! And more preemie sized diapers!” Fortunately we lived right beside a plaza that had a Shoppers Drug Mart, so G left at lightning speed once the boys slept and picked up everything we needed, plus food for us for at least 2 days. Since the boys were born preemie, but strong enough to be discharged, I felt that them leaving the house at the time may not be a great idea since their immunity was still developing. So we were in immediate survival mode.
The next couple of days, every 2.5 to 3 hours was spent breastfeeding (or trying to!), then formula top up (which takes forever to warm up to room temp), then me pumping (or trying to!), then cleaning and sterilizing bottles, then only having 30 minutes until they woke up again. In retrospect, I have no idea how G and I survived that. I’m so glad my mom was able to come by the next day to help out while G went to work for a bit.
So if you recall in my post about our hospital stay, there was some issues with our neighbour in our building. I won’t be getting into any detail, but somehow in the middle of the night on September 1, 2015, G and I had a conversation that would change everything so quickly. The issue with our neighbour got pretty bad that we realized we were in “parent mode” and had to think about the safety of our children now. In our sleep-deprived-zombie-like state, we were discussing our options, which we eventually broke down and started yelling (not at each other though) and then eventually bawled. The very last thing we wanted to do was call our parents. I had so much pride thinking we can make our situation work on our own the entire time I was pregnant, but we reached a breaking point. So I called my mom, at about 2am that morning. Next thing I hear from her was “how about you four come over now?…Okay, we’ll help you first thing in the morning. Pack enough clothes for a week for G, you and the boys and stay with us and we’ll figure everything out. It will be okay.” While I was talking to my mom, I can hear G explaining to his dad our situation so we were all on the same page.
After we got off our phones, we knew we made the right decision to call for help. We then cried again together. Not only because of the frustration with our neighbour, but how much work and effort we spent renovating it when we first got it in September 2011, and then trying to fix up our place and make it work and be a home for just us four, until we were ready to move out. We even had ideas where the boys would take their milestones around our condo.
So as soon as we unofficially moved out, we spent the next 4.5 months living like gypsies with our parents, dividing our time between mine and his. Both our parents’ live across the city, at least almost an hour apart.
Within those 4.5 months, we listed our condo for sale on September 20, 2015. It sold within a week! Closing was on October 26, 2015. We spent that time moving our stuff into storage. Our new place would not be ready until January 2016, which is why we lived the nomadic life for a few months and had to put some things in storage. We did have some family time at our condo while we still had it in our possession. We had frequent doctors and breastfeeding clinic appointments, so we needed somewhere to hang out and wait for traffic to die down.
We also had to get a new car as my’03 Jeep Liberty (aka Libby) was on its last legs. On September 15, 2015, I was a proud owner of a 2015 GMC Terrain (aka Terry). Even though G still had his 325xi, it was small and not really a family friendly. Again, had to think about the safety of my kids. I thought I had more time with the Libby, but with a tire leaking every 3 days and no time or worth to get it fixed, I had to make the change. Especially if we had to travel from either the west end or east end to get to our frequent doctor visits in North York. So not only did I have to say goodbye to our first place together, I had to say bye to my first car. Booo…
Amidst all these changes, I am so grateful for everything that has happened. There were more events that happened during our gypsy phase, but letting go of your major “firsts” was pretty eventful. In my case, first place to live and first car. On January 11, 2016, we were settled in our new place, or I would like to call it “our home for now”. We are presently still living in “our home for now” and do plan to get another place probably when the boys start school (they’re now almost 18 months!) As much as we appreciated all the help from our parents in the first 4.5 months of the boys’ lives, it was nice to have a place of our own again. We felt that while the boys are still young, that being near one set of grandparents would be ideal in case we needed help. So we moved near mine, also because it’s very close to my place of business. The boys were almost 5 months when we settled in our place, given that they were “solid” and not as fragile as when they were in their preemie/newborn phase.
As I reflect on those 4.5 months, everything happens for a reason. As much as it was stressful at times, I felt that we were more blessed than stressed. Sounds corny, I know, but these boys have made everything G and I have done worthwhile. We knew it wasn’t just about G and I anymore, and that was fine by us.
Til next post!